origami

My creative writing teacher told me today that I was a good writer...when it comes to annotations. But the long piece just doesn't work, he says matter of fact-ly. The advice that ensued was supremely vague: Just write like your annotations, he says. But here is the thing:

Annotations are easy, because they are just like blog posts. They are short, free-styled, and need no plot nor arc. Can one say the same for an eight-to-ten page paper that will only garner a coveted A (they were so easy to come by in middle school!) when it's at publishable level? The same problem extends to academic papers: give me two paragraphs, I can write 3 focused pages. Give me an entire work, and tell me to write 10...I'm suddenly left flopping on the page, like a freshly caught silver trout, bouncing high yet going nowhere.

The thing about reflection is...it is just an elegant edit of your streaming thoughts. Streaming. -Ing. -I...n...g. Present Progressive Tense. There is no plot because I haven't seen the ending yet. When I write philosophy papers I write the introduction last. When I write blog posts I come up with a title after I finish. These things give the illusion of an arc. Like I was going somewhere. But how can I do it for an eight-to-ten? Are my reflections supposed to unfold past the length of an internet ramble, but finish with a flourish when the header page number displays '10'? Is the crane's beak always so easily produced as the finishing touch? And what if after you nimbly fold down that delicate, last corner, you realize that the very first crease--on a previously perfectly square, perfectly un-wrinkled sheet of paper--was crooked? What will you do then? Will you take it apart, and start all over again?

But the creases have already been made.

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