the ride

i hate it when people say, it'll come to you when you stop looking for it. Is that supposed to be practical advice? Hey you, you want this thing here? Good, now do nothing about it, don't even want it.

The thing about desire is, once you have one, you can't not do something about it. It's got only one lever, and that's the gas petal. Can you ever brake a desire, get out of the ride, and say, no thanks, I'd rather catch the next one?

On the roller coaster cart's way to the top, you wish for all the world for the cart to pause indefinitely at the apex, rather remaining indifferent forever than take the inevitable drop. But at that point, nothing's in your hands anymore. So you throw them up in the air and hope for the best.

At that moment when the earth becomes frighteningly small through your eyes, how do you stop it all?

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